


Desert Oasis

by FiresFromOurHearts



Series: Uncharted Waters [3]
Category: Naruto
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, BAMF Temari (Naruto), BAMF Women, Family, Family Bonding, Family Issues, Gen, Intelligent Temari, Kazekage Temari, Nor a good Kazekage to be honest, Rasa (Naruto) is not a great parent, Sibling Love, Strength, Sunagakure | Hidden Sand Village, Teamwork, Treason, Women Being Awesome, Women In Power, is taking down your father when he's being a shit leader obviously, world building
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-10
Updated: 2020-12-10
Packaged: 2021-03-09 18:34:08
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,120
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27990825
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FiresFromOurHearts/pseuds/FiresFromOurHearts
Summary: She's bruises and broken bones, sand under your nails, stone beneath your knees, she's bloodied knuckles and a fierce snarl. She's Temari of the fucking desert and she will never bow her head.OR before Temari is ready, she places the Kazekage hat on her head. But she has been courting treason and planning to be Kage for many years. Her plans might have moved up on the timeline, but they are still there. Before that, however, she is only a child facing a world of danger with only her brother beside her. Not much changes over the years, but, at the same time, everything does.Technically a side-scene for the Sea Never Dies series but can be read alone too. Quick explanation for something is given in the first note.
Series: Uncharted Waters [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1875832
Comments: 10
Kudos: 32





	Desert Oasis

**Author's Note:**

  * For [SilverUtahraptor](https://archiveofourown.org/users/SilverUtahraptor/gifts).



> I don't know if you remember this Silver, though I do. But you were having a bad day I believe, and bad days happen and sometimes life is shitty. But. My brain was like "write a badass kunoichi for Silver". And so, this fic was born with its unofficial title "this is Silver's in every way". And I really think at minimum 25% of the AUs and extra scenes for this series is due to you. That's definitely not a bad thing. 
> 
> For those of you who are reading this without reading The Sea Never Dies series, a quick rundown is this: Gaara gets his sealed fixed during the attack on Konoha in the chunin exams. That's all you pretty much need to know.

When Temari places the Kazekage hat on her head, her hands do not shake. She is a ninja and so they never will.

_(She places the hat on her head. She does it herself. No one helps her. This is the strength of Sunagakure. You do things yourself and show your strength so that the world will listen to you. Suna will watch and wait and when you have power, they will bow their heads and heed your words and follow your orders.)_

When Temari places the Kazekage hat on her head, her hands do not shake. She has been imagining this for years. Sometimes she takes it from a blood-stained corpse. Sometimes she earns it properly. She is older in her imagination. She always is. Her hands never shook then, and they do not shake now.

But perhaps this is starting too far forward. Because Temari’s hands did shake, once upon a time. She has not always been a ninja.

_(Once upon a time, Temari’s hands shook and shook and shook. They would not stop trembling.)_

* * *

When she is three, Temari’s mother dies. She will not remember it. Too young to properly understand. She just knows her mother is gone and won’t be returning. She throws a tantrum and Kankurō joins in, _(because even then, they are in this together)_. Gaara is not there. He has just been born and he will never know a mother’s love, but this is far from his story. This is Temari’s.

Temari will not remember the way she cries. She will not remember Kankurō also crying. She will not remember someone telling her to stand up and brush off her tears because the members of the Kazekage family do not conduct themselves in such manners.

But she will remember the way the ground feels beneath her hands, years later, when she pushes herself up again and again. She will remember the feeling of sand in her mouth before she spits it out. She will not remember every bruise she has ever had, there will be far too many, _(too many to even count)_ , but she will know how it feels to press against a bruise. She will remember the way it says, _I am alive, I am alive, I am alive._

At three, though, Temari does not know any of this. She just knows her mother is gone and she has another brother but she doesn’t know him yet. She will not know him properly for another thirteen years, _(and it will not be too late)_.

* * *

Temari no longer cries when she’s six. Not in front of anyone, at least. It’s shameful to cry, don’t you know? It’s a weakness. The Kazekage family do not get to have weaknesses. They are strong, _(and strength, she knows, is everything in Suna)_.

But sometimes… Sometimes, after trying and trying and failing, Temari locks herself away in her room and cries. She cannot help it. She just gets so frustrated trying and always failing to do something. Her father says she should be better at it. That she should be able to do it. But she can’t! She can’t! And it hurts. Somewhere in her chest. It brings tears to her eyes and she rubs them away but they keep coming. They don’t stop.

She’s a big girl now, though, so she wipes them away and cries alone in her room. Then she gets up, wipes away any sign of tears, ignores her puffy eyes, and gets back to work. She will be strong.

* * *

Suna is made up of multiple factions, Temari knows. Some are stronger than others. These are the important ones.

_(Our economy is getting weaker and weaker every day, Temari does not say. She doesn’t have the words yet. She sees Suna’s people in the streets, people under her family’s rule, and they are hard. The land is hard and so are they, but the times are harder. They are lean where they shouldn’t be, brittle where they should be sharp, wasting away when they should be safe.)_

The major factions in the ninja community are that of the poison industry and the Puppet Corps. The poison industry is run under the steady eye of Honoured Grandmother Chiyo and the only reason that they remain so powerful is because Chiyo has always supported her father in his position as Kazekage, even before he claimed the title for himself.

It is the Puppet Corps that often has her father’s eyebrows furrowing. They are powerful, famous within the village and outside of it. For the most part, they are removed from politics and the governing structures of Sunagakure. However, they’re also run by a ninja who has not always supported Rasa, even if they haven’t gone against Rasa.

But this does not matter. Not to Temari. What matters is that Rasa takes her six-year-old brother and gives him to the Puppet Corps. This is not the tradition of the Kazekage family, but it is tradition for the Puppet Corps.

_(The Puppet Corps take children when they are young, teach them their ways, and then give them back. They do not remove the children from society nor steal them from their families and friends, but they do take them and their time. They are never returned the same as they once were. They are stronger. It is for the good of Suna.)_

_(They are different, people whisper to themselves. The Puppet Corps’ traditions are shrouded in mystery. Some believe that there are spirits, hidden within the depths of the Puppet Corps Headquarters, that spirits bestow them with gifts. They hide their faces, give themselves masks, perhaps they even become spirits themselves.)_

_(They always survive where they should not. When they are not meant to live, they do. Where they are meant to fail, they thrive. Temari does not know this. She does not hear the whispers and does not live on the rumours. Her brother has been taken and she will mourn for him.)_

Her father tells her off the first time she leaves her training to try and find Kankurō. Suddenly, her life takes off in a whirlwind of training. There is no time to go looking for Kankurō.

But Temari’s mother is years dead and Rasa is the Kazekage more than he is her father. She has one family member who she loves unreservedly and would always love. Kankurō. Maybe the Puppet Corps is training him, maybe he is learning from some of the best, but maybe he is alone and waiting for Temari to come and get him.

_(Just like he did when they were younger, and she trained and he was watched by nannies, and no one ever gave them love. No one tucked them into bed or read them stories. Temari learnt how to cook Kankurō’s favourite meal when she was six because it was the only birthday gift she could offer him. They whispered stories to each other, born of children’s imaginations, because it was all they had. They would fight and pinch each other, throw tantrums and scream, but they only ever had each other, so they always stuck together in the end.)_

There might be no time during the day thanks to ninja training, but Temari has been watching the world around her with wide eyes for her whole life, _(she does not know how to use them—not yet)_. She clocks the obvious patrols, watches the way she gets ignored so long as she doesn’t step out of line.

On a moonless night in the height of winter, she slips out the window and drops down onto the sand below. By now, she knows enough to roll and keep her fall soundless. She still gets sand in her mouth and it gets stuck beneath her fingernails. It’s irritating, but there’s no point caring about such small things.

Besides, she has a brother to find.

When Temari reaches the entrance of the Puppet Corps Headquarters, she realises she has no plan on how to get in. She knows better than to try and slip through a window. The Puppet Corps traps are legendary and she knows they’ve worked alongside the poison industry in harmony for generations. There is only one thing to do.

Kankurō is her brother so Temari steels her spine and marches up to the door. It opens before she gets there and a ninja looks down at her, sneering. She glares back. “I’m here to speak to Kankurō.”

“Are you, little girl?” The ninja says, raising an eyebrow.

Temari does not back down, does not even flinch. She stands still, stands steady, _(but her hands become fists if only to hide the fact her fingers still tremble)_. “Yes.”

The ninja tilts his head. Doesn’t soften, but takes a step back and lets her in. “I’ll take you to him.”

Kankurō spots her before she spots him. He charges at her and they crash together, unfaltering, gripping one another tightly enough to leave bruises. He is not the same brother taken from her, but she is not the same either. They have grown, in the absence of each other, having faced new trials and challenges. For the first time, they have learnt different things from one another.

Then, Kankurō pulls back, meets her eyes, fingers still pressing bruises into her skin, _(because in Suna, one can only ever be stronger)_. “These are not Rasa’s people here,” the words are a whisper, a breath in her ear. No one else will hear them, can hear them. But his words are not a warning. Suna listens to her father because he is strong, _(because they fear him)_.

His words are not a warning or a threat. They are another thought, a new consideration. Temari is seven and Kankurō is six and they are all they have, _(but they are not each other’s worlds, already they both know how big the world is)_. Kankurō will remain with the Puppet Corps for a total of two years and Temari will live with her father, be under his stern gaze, and she will train and train and train.

She breathes out, steady. Even. Considers everything. “Make allies,” she says, softly so that no one else can hear her. “Rasa wants you too.”

_(But don’t do it for him, she doesn’t add, do it for yourself. Gain your own allies and faction, she does not say. Or maybe she does. Words aren’t the only way to talk after all.)_

It was dangerous enough coming to the Puppet Corps, and Temari knows she cannot stay long. She can’t take her brother with her either, not that she ever planned to. “I’ll leave a letter at our dead drop,” she promises and he nods in understanding, _(because they have planned for things they don’t quite understand, but they have still planned for it)_. And then she’s gone, disappearing further into Suna on a moonless night.

_(And for the first time she wonders, why is the Puppet Corps Headquarters so far from Suna’s centre?)_

* * *

Temari’s brother is training hard, becoming stronger. He is gaining allies and learning his craft. She does the same, has to do it, because they are in Suna. Temari has always noticed the world around her, no one has had to teach her to watch. She has always had wide eyes; she has always paid attention.

In front of her, someone says, “Kaori didn’t return from her A-rank.”

“She’ll be missed,” someone answers, but there’s only resignation there. No surprise. Expectation, almost.

There’s not much to go off, but something in Temari tells her this is important, and every good ninja knows to trust their instincts.

_(It’s the same thing that tells her to hold steady beneath her father’s gaze. The same thing that tells her she cannot let her fingers tremble when another is watching. It’s the thing that told her to get up, get up, get up, and keep fighting.)_

As the daughter of the Kazekage, Temari has more information and secrets in her house than she probably should. She can get access to the files if she is stealthy enough and careful enough. The key is to act like she is helping her father, _(no one questions it; after all, they’re all Suna’s mindless drones directed by their leader)_.

She finds Kaori’s file. Takes it. Reads it. Finds herself staring at the number of ninjas marked KIA on one of the memorial transcripts. Suna is strong, _(they cannot be otherwise)_ , and maybe her economy isn’t great and her people are suffering, but they are still strong.

But the ninjas… Only a few war heroes remain alive. And those that are alive have retired, and are content to support her father. Any ninja that seems to be gaining more and more power dies on a mission.

Temari reads file after file. The hours disappear. The words do not. They cannot. They are harsh, characters sharp, and they stare at her, accusing. Temari does not tell them she couldn’t do anything, that she’ll improve things, that something will change. There’s no point wasting her breathe on meaningless platitudes, _(her words will mean nothing to these documents)_.

_(When she was sneaking around at night, Temari once heard whispers she shouldn’t have. “The Kazekage will have you killed if he hears you speak up against him!” had been words that she’d never heard before. Hadn’t even thought about it.)_

_(“Just another name on the KIA transcript,” the reply had come. Only resignation. Only exhaustion. And so Temari learnt to listen. Hear the rumours, the whispers, the things not made for her ears. And the things she heard were damning. The things she didn’t hear more so.)_

There are enough coincidences that there’s a pattern. There’s enough evidence there that Temari wonders if there’s something more damning elsewhere. She does not go looking, _(the people cannot rise up against the Kazekage, not when the sand can swallow them whole and there are rumours of a demon-child following the Kazekage’s orders out in the desert, turning the sand to blood)_.

At eight, Temari is still training beneath a rotating group of retired ninjas, most once working in the Academy, but some only ever tapped as jōnin-senseis. She learns to sharpen weapons herself, the danger of having weapons out in a sandstorm due to the damage the sand can inflict, and she’s finally taught how to use tessen.

The war fans don’t quite feel _right_ in Temari’s hands, but she enjoys using them. They’re not easy, but that makes it better. She works hard, twists and turns and flips. There are three main styles for tessenjutsu in Sunagakure, which is three more than most villages. As Suna-nins often have wind chakra, war fans, whether they be gunbai or tessen, are frequently used and taught.

Although she learns both tessen and gunbai, the latter suits Temari better. She doesn’t have a style to call her own yet, but the foundations are there. However, when her teacher mentions one of the more well known gunbai users, Madara, who was famous in Suna for creating the giant gunbai, _(which has been used, historically, by the Uchiha Clan but has fallen out of fashion in recent decades)_ , Temari starts thinking.

The tesenjutsu style she favours is made to be fluid, slip around blows, and be like a teasing breeze. But Temari’s preferred taijutsu style, which should form a foundation for her tessenjutsu style, is fast, yes, but made for standing your ground and not backing down. She is the howling storm, powerful and unrelenting.

_(She doesn’t know it yet, won’t know it even when she has a giant tessen in her hands, but she will create a new tessenjutsu style that will become well known in Suna and outside of Suna. She will be remembered in history, not just for who she was and the position she held, but for what she created.)_

_(But Temari is eight and knows none of this. She just knows how to describe what she wants and how to pay for it. Her teachers question her, but she gains their agreement, and so she has a giant tessen forged even though such a thing has never been done before. When she holds it, it feels right.)_

* * *

A few months before she turns nine, Kankurō returns to her house. Temari had known ahead of time due to the secret letters they’d exchanged, which makes the whole affair sound like a bad espionage mission, rather than simply avoiding their father.

Still, she makes a vague show of being surprised when their father stands next to Kankurō, heavy hand on his shoulder and says, “Your brother has finished his first years in the Puppet Corps training program.”

“Congratulations,” Temari says. Her father nods and then he is gone again, back to his office and his seat, _(back to identifying influential ninjas and deciding whether to have them KIA on a mission)_.

Then they are alone and hugging, showing emotions in a way they hesitate to do in front of their father. In the Kazekage’s residence, without their father, they are the safest they will ever be. They both know this.

“The Puppet Corps,” Kankurō begins, “are only following Rasa since there are no other viable candidates and it’s too dangerous to go against Rasa at the moment.”

They are seven and eight, too young to be thinking of coups and politics, but they will be ninjas and they are children of the Kazekage, and so they already know how to think of these things. Why they need to think of these things.

_(No one ever took Temari by the hand and showed her Suna and said these are your people. But this is a fact she knows in her bones anyway.)_

“And they will listen to you?” Temari asks, because Kankurō is a child regardless of his family, because the rules and traditions of the Puppet Corps are not well known, because Kankurō is her brother and she would not go against him if he wanted to be Kazekage.

“In time,” Kankurō answers, because he is a child and they will not listen to him. He has strength, but to the Puppet Corps, he has no name. He is nobody, for now, but not forever. He will prove himself and they will listen to him.

_(The Kazekage gave him to the Puppet Corps so that Rasa could control them through Kankurō. He didn’t think that Kankurō would decide to take the Puppet Corps for another reason.)_

* * *

At ten, she knows too much and too little. But the main thing she knows is this: Suna isn’t strong, they are _weak_. Rasa may claim they are strong, time after time, and everyone might claim that Suna values strength above all else. Yet Temari has seen, time after time, Rasa take those who dare become powerful, _(who might contest him, in time)_ , and watched as he sends them out on missions, _(waits for the KIA message to come because they never, ever survive)_.

Suna does not believe in friends or teams like Konoha. They believe in strength while standing alone. Temari values the strength in standing alone, except she can also see how—in standing alone—your back is open and no one will risk their life to save you. Allies, though, are plentiful and sometimes that lets you live even when you shouldn’t.

_(Temari does not go through the MIA list, searching for ninjas who may’ve run because anywhere is better than Suna. She does not want those people as allies—maybe they ran because Rasa wants them dead, but their loyalty should be to Suna above all else. If they have fled, then they are not loyal.)_

Suna is not strong because their strength is cut from them, torn away by Rasa, removed with a jagged blade that leaves gashes bleeding and bleeding and bleeding. They never heal, can’t heal, when they are constantly reopened. It happens, again and again. Ninja reported KIA and the list grows, never stopping.

This is what Suna teaches Temari: You get strong, you get murdered. There is power in status. She’s afforded some leeway as the eldest daughter of the Kazekage. There is power in knowledge. She knows enough to keep herself hidden and out of Rasa’s sight. There is power in fighting. She can fight, bruises on bruises, bones broken from trying too hard, and her fingers don’t tremble anymore. You have to be strong to survive in Suna but you can’t be too strong, can’t stand out.

_(She may be the daughter of the Kazekage, but she knows Rasa will kill her if she tries to rise up and contest him too early.)_

They are ninjas and plan in advance. Temari is ten and years under Rasa’s tyranny stretch out before her. But Rasa’s rule will end—has to end, and Temari will be the one to do it. Kankurō stands with her, at her side, will always be there. He is loyal to her above all else, listens to her and offers his own advice in turn. They are stronger together and weak apart, or so they appear. It’s a façade well-made and it will remain that way.

_(If Suna considers teamwork a weakness, then being strong together will be ignored in light of how they are weak apart. Another way to hide from Rasa and keep him from paying attention. Nonetheless, it is a delicate line to walk. Too weak and they risk Rasa’s personal attention. Too strong and they risk being beaten down.)_

Kankurō works amongst the Puppet Corps. Claims a name as he creates a puppet of his own. He becomes _known_. He starts with those closest to his age, those who teach him, and gains their loyalty. Always, he knows, they will be loyal to the Puppet Master above all else—this is a starting place, though. Everyone starts somewhere.

And while Kankurō gains allies in the Puppet Corps, Temari goes through teacher after teacher and begins to gain their trust. She reaches out to those not organised by her father, works to keep training sessions private and unknown. The private training she receives makes it difficult, but she is nearing the age of being a genin, which means she will be working amongst people her age and so she reaches out to them, _(and no one looks at her and thinks that something is strange)_.

* * *

Yashamaru dies shortly after Temari turns ten. He is her uncle in name and in blood, but they have never been close. She sees him rarely, often at odd times when she’s awake in the middle of the night and getting a glass of water. He’s not been in their life often, but when he does, it makes her uncomfortable. There’s something _off_ about him.

_(She doesn’t know where his loyalties lie, never has. She thinks he is loyal to Rasa, but sometimes she wonders. He is secretive, most likely an ANBU, except that doesn’t explain why he is always secretive or why he only comes to their house when she and Kankurō are usually asleep.)_

Yashamaru dies and Temari is ten and she doesn’t mourn. He had always been too distant for her to know, but she stands beside Kankurō for the small funeral anyway. They claim he died on a mission and, as there is no body, this seems to fit. However, both Temari and Kankurō have a sense that tells them when Rasa is lying or covering something—and the reason for death rings false.

She doesn’t focus on that for long, though. Not when Rasa comes to them with a child and tells them that he is their brother. Temari has one brother—Kankurō. She doesn’t want another, has no need for another. And this child is shaped like Suna’s rumours of a devil—small and pale and red-haired, sand following his command.

The child doesn’t try to talk to her or Kankurō either. Just watches with those wide eyes and never, ever sleeps. Initially, Kankurō tries to engage the child—Gaara—and Temari tries to talk to him. After they watch him kill an adult for brushing past him, they no longer try. They keep their distance, wary and knowing that something is wrong with Gaara.

They do not acknowledge him as family. He is as much of an outsider as Yashamaru, but not as hated as Rasa. Feared, yes, but not hated.

_(And, sometimes, Temari mourns for the brother she will never get to know, grieve for the one that Rasa took and shaped and broke, leaving serrated edges that are wielded against any who come near.)_

* * *

Temari graduates with ease, as is expected of her. She’s apprenticed under Baki, technically, but takes missions with various other genins. She racks up the required amount of D-ranks and is then moved to C-ranks. This is what is expected of her. She is the daughter of the Kazekage and cannot be weak, _(cannot be strong)_.

However, she is a child and so is Kankurō and they will slip up. Of course, they will. They are children, for all they try not to be. But they are lucky, for they slip up in front of Baki who, after training Temari for months, trusts in his student and perhaps believes in her more than he should.

Baki is loyal to Suna, always has been. He has heard the rumours and voiced none of them. He does not speak of those who whisper treason in the shadows. And when Temari calls their Kazekage Rasa, rather than Kazekage-sama, he says nothing. It is the first step in a marathon, far from the easiest but far, far from the hardest.

Temari doesn’t trust him straight away, even when he makes no mention of it and doesn’t tell Rasa. She watches, waits, asks her allies for information and even has Kankurō ask around in the Puppet Corps, _(and the Puppet Corps do not like outsiders, will not say a word of Kankurō’s actions because they protect their own—but they will not protect Temari, she only has herself here)_.

A month passes, then two. She doesn’t slip up again, but she thinks that Baki might be trustworthy. Not right now, not when she is only eleven and a genin and nowhere near strong enough for any of her plans. In time, when she can protect herself and Kankurō and put words to what she feels. Then, and only then, will she trust him.

_(For all that she calls her father Rasa, some part of her still loves him. As much as she plans to rise against him one day, he is still her father and she still bows down to him—not only because he is strong. She does not know how to give words to the anger and anxiety bubbling within her. She looks at Gaara and fears. But when she thinks of him, she only hates, mourns, rages. It makes no sense. Not yet. One day, though—one day it will.)_

* * *

When Kankurō graduates to genin, he technically loses the training offered by the Puppet Corps, instead coming under the purview of the Genin Corps Commander. However, the Puppet Corps have never let their own go that easily. He goes to them, still, trains with them, learns from them.

Rasa calls Kankurō to his office, stares his middle child down, and asks, “Do you control the Puppet Corps?”

Beside Kankurō stands Temari. Or, perhaps, Kankurō stands beside Temari. It doesn’t matter. What matters is that Kankurō doesn’t look at Temari, just feels her nudge his foot once, and says, “I will soon.” It is the truth, but when Rasa says ‘you’ he really means ‘me’, and when Kankurō says ‘I’, he means exactly what he says.

The Puppet Corps will soon listen to Kankurō more so than they already do. He has to rise through the Puppet Corps ranks first, and then they will listen to Kankurō—and he will listen to Temari.

“Good,” Rasa says. He dismisses them then, without another word. And Kankurō doesn’t flinch, doesn’t actually care, _(he cares for his sister and only her; he loves her unreservedly with all the innocence of a child and all the loyalty of a soldier)_ , and Temari wonders what it’d be like to be a child of someone else. She wouldn’t give up Kankurō for anything, but sometimes she wonders what a parent’s love actually feels like.

There are many things Temari wishes to say to Rasa, but she curbs her temper and unleashes it when training alone. She uses her rage to fuel her motions, to make herself stronger. She is dangerous and deadly and the sand viper coiled up in the desert, hidden and waiting for the right moment to strike.

_(What Temari will never know is that she’ll never get a chance to spit the anger-coated words in Rasa’s face. She will not get to condemn him for his actions—the way he ruined Suna and destroyed their strength; the way he broke their family and left them in pieces; the way he never did his best for Suna or for his family.)_

_(One day, she will stand in front of his grave and spit her words at him. It will not make her feel better, but she will feel lighter. She will tell him that Suna is better now that he’s no longer in it. She will tell him that Gaara loves and is loved in turn. She will tell him that he fucked up and that Gaara is better than him in every way. She will not cry to him and she will not tell him that they’re not weapons. They are weapons and soldiers and Temari hasn’t cried since she was six.)_

* * *

Suna doesn’t have teams, not really. They’re moved around to best suit the mission. It’s served them well in the past and it’s another reason why personal strength is important. And yet, Kankurō and her get put on the same team under Baki. From the get-go, Temari’s left wondering whether this is some plan of Rasa’s, _(she always fears that he knows more than he says, but he seems to still underestimate her, which is proof that he doesn’t know)_.

Along with Baki, they go on missions and come back successful. Sometimes they take longer, train in the desert and other terrains. Baki pushes them through their paces, watches them, trains them, _(teaches them how to survive in a political climate, although they are not officially in one)_.

Then, when she is fifteen, Gaara is officially promoted to genin. He is placed on Temari’s team and they are proclaimed as a team on paper. It’s binding, in a way that Suna doesn’t normally do. It’s a threat, too, because Gaara is Rasa’s weapon, dangerous and unstable as he is. He is Rasa’s to direct and, Temari knows, if Rasa ordered Gaara to kill her, _(or, even worse, Kankurō)_ , Gaara would do it without hesitation. He sees no reason to avoid killing. In some ways, he is Rasa without his intellect, only bloodthirsty and cruel, _(in more ways, he is not like Rasa in the least—but Temari doesn’t know that, not yet)_.

With Gaara, they go on missions that are more dangerous or, perhaps, just more bloody. The B-rank they go on doesn’t end in any of them dying, somehow. Kankurō’s main puppet ends up in more pieces than it started in and Temari breaks, not only her arm, but also her giant tessen that has been with her almost four years, _(she will have a new one created, mourn the loss of her old one, and remember it fondly—but it is only a weapon, and so she will keep walking with her head held high)_.

After the B-rank mission, they’re called into Rasa’s office alongside Baki. The office is crowded, groups of genins and jōnin teachers. Temari meets the eyes of the ones she knows, nods at them, however doesn’t do anything else, _(shouldn’t do anything else considering the office she is in, the danger watching them, the eye of a giant wanting to beat down those like him)_. Kankurō shifts at her side, but he’s not uneasy. The rumours of Konohagakure’s Chūnin Exams have existed within the Puppet Corps for almost a month now, they’ve both been waiting on this.

_(It is far past time for both of them to be chūnins. Temari has hidden her strength, kept it quiet, and Kankurō has claimed to be training, always, within the Puppet Corps and that they refuse to consider him as a chūnin ninja. But Gaara has changed their plans because he does not care for their deaths, would kill them himself if granted the opportunity. Besides, Rasa expects them to be promoted soon; his worsening frowns have told them that much. This is their chance—to get away from Gaara, to be promoted to chūnin, to reach out to more Suna-nins and find allies.)_

“Everyone dismissed. Baki’s team, remain behind,” Rasa finally orders. Temari refuses to stiffen. Her spine is already steel, her posture has never faltered in this office, not since she was young, _(she does not let it, she never will)_. He gazes at them, chakra still hidden but Temari knows its power, remembers the way it pressed against her skin, remembers how difficult it was to breathe. She remains steady, keeps her own breathing even, and bows her head, _(doesn’t meet his eyes; just thinks how much she’d love to see him dead and gone)_.

“You will pass,” he tells them, _(orders them; Temari’s hands don’t form fists, but she can feel her nails pressing against her palms anyway)_. “Prove to Konoha that we are far from _weak._ ” His lip curls, the words infused with disgust. “Prove that we are strong.”

_(Technically, all three of them could be promoted and no one in Suna would bat an eye. They’ve earned it, but Rasa does everything for a reason. This is clearly why.)_

She bows, bites back her hate and rage and treason. “Yes, Kazekage-sama,” she says, the rest of her team—sans Gaara—echoes her.

_(Temari does not know it, but this will be the last time she sees her father.)_

* * *

Konohagakure tells them that the Kazekage is dead, then carefully escorts their remaining force home. Temari doesn’t fight it, wouldn’t dare. Their position is too precarious to even think about doing such a thing. And the genins she knows, those she has claimed as allies, look to her as a leader, look at her to figure out what they should do. And Baki follows her lead, _(sometimes he feels like the only adult who has seen her for herself and has cared for her because of who she is, not because of Rasa)_ , whilst the other jōnin-senseis follow him.

Upon returning to Suna, the village is in chaos. Their Kazekage is dead, their alliance with Konohagakure is in jeopardy, if it hasn’t already been revoked. The world will look at their village and talk about their weakness, their disgrace. This is, perhaps, the most important time for Suna to appear strong, _(but how can they appear strong when Rasa has killed their strongest for years)_.

“Your plans?” Kankurō inquires when they reach the safety of their home. They have planned for Rasa’s death, yes, but—years away. Not now. Not any time soon. Temari thought they’d have longer, _(she never thought they’d be in this scenario)_.

Temari doesn’t rely on her breathe to control herself. She is steady, strong, and her hands never shake. “We need to tighten our borders,” she says, thinking about it like it’s a question posed by Baki-sensei.

_Suna’s in a state of crisis, the Kazekage has been murdered, and Suna’s just lost a major battle. What would you do?_

Find the Kazekage’s body. Somehow make Suna strong. Prepare for responding attacks. Find a new Kazekage, _(take the hat for yourself)_.

“And we need to find Rasa,” she adds. “Send out some of the Puppet Corps to tighten our borders,” she decides. “I’ll speak with the Jōnin Commander about sending out teams to search for his body.”

“As you command,” Kankurō says with a joking smile and a bow that is all too real. “The council is likely to ask for Kazekage candidates soon, you know.”

“Yes,” Temari agrees, “which is why I’ll need you by my side then.”

_(They are born of the Kazekage line. For generations, their family has taken the Kazekage hat themselves; an unbroken line. Despite their status as genins, the council will still look at them for candidates—and maybe their plans have been thrown out the window and thoroughly blown up, but Temari will still fight for the Kazekage hat.)_

Kankurō nods. “And Gaara?”

Gaara is their little brother, but he’s never truly been part of their family. Like Yashamaru but to an even smaller degree, because Temari has been afraid of Gaara for years now, _(and she has hated Rasa for what he did for just as long)_. More importantly, though, is that Gaara has acted differently ever since they came back from Konohagakure. Quieter. Or maybe just more there, less likely to be antisocial. Temari’s not sure what to make of it.

“We keep watch,” she decides. There’s no point wondering whether Gaara will turn on them, trying to figure out his motivations. It’s never worked before and she doubts it’ll work now. “The Kazekage battle will be held soon. From there, we can make more decisions.”

It sounds so simple. The Kazekage battle. A simple fight—but Temari knows the truth. It is far from simple. Being Kazekage is about being strong. Not only do you have to be capable of fighting, but also surviving and having allies to support you, should the need arise. Suna determines their Kazekage by having one ninja stand before everyone and dare them to fight. The person who remains standing at the end, without pledging their allegiance to anyone else, becomes Kazekage. It is a tradition as old as the village itself.

Kankurō inclines his head in agreement. “I stand with you,” he says, traditional words flowing from his lips, “and for you, if you ask.”

_(She will fight, Temari knows, in the Kazekage battle because this is the only future she’s ever envisioned. And, beside her, Kankurō has always stood, to fight if she asks and to watch her back and support her. He is the one connected to the Puppet Corps and the poison industry of Suna, where Temari is connected to the general ninja population.)_

There’s no traditional way to answer, at least not anything written down in their histories. But Kankurō is Temari’s brother, always has been and always will be. She pulls him into a hug, whispers, “Thank you,” into his ear because he knows how much this means, knows how important this is. Then, she steps back, smiles the way she usually does, _(the way she does in the middle of a fight)_ , and says, “Let’s go prepare.”

* * *

When Temari walks from the Kazekage house to the arena, she walks behind Baki. Baki will vouch for her, trained her, but will not fight her battles for her, _(not always do the Kazekage candidates choose this path; far more often they walk alone, for there is strength in being alone but Temari is fighting for a new Suna and this is just the beginning)_. He leads her towards Suna’s sole arena, meanwhile Kankurō and Gaara flank her.

She doesn’t know why Gaara is there—he did not offer, but he stands with her regardless. He is different now, Konohagakure is far behind them and it seems like the world has changed as a result. He listens to her, now, supports her in a quiet way without making any grand gestures. It’s more than he’s ever done before, _(for the first time, Temari feels tentative hope that their broken family can actually be a family)_.

As they walk the streets, Temari feels like she notices everything. The wind that brushes against her, gentle. The grains of sand that are kicked up and catch in her clothes. The civilian kids that watch with wide eyes, shrinking back from Gaara but still staring at them all in awe.

_(She does not, cannot, know everything however. She does not know that, by walking with her siblings, she has made history. Never before have members of the Kazekage family gone together to support one person. They have always fought against each other, destroyed one another, and only one had ever been left standing. Together the three of them go, making history with every step.)_

When they enter the arena, Temari does not feel like she is entering it for the first time. She has fought here before, worked on repairing it before, trained here before. The reason _why_ is new, but this is what Temari has been preparing for. Maybe the timeframe has changed, come sooner than she had ever thought—but she is still here, the fight will still happen, and she is still strong.

Temari leaps down to the arena floor, lands with a roll and then comes up on her feet. The sand is gentle below, deceptively soft—she knows how much sand hurts when it grazes whether it be due to a gust of wind or scraping along the ground. She stands and she smiles and she waits.

_(She is a fighter; a soldier; a warrior. She will not lose and she will never bow her head.)_

* * *

When Temari places the Kazekage hat on her head, her hands do not shake. When Temari places the Kazekage hat on her head, the weight on her shoulders doesn’t increase. When Temari places the Kazekage hat on her head, nothing changes.

_(Her hands have not shaken for years. She has always weathered weight on her shoulders.)_

Temari has always sought for power, stolen strength from the wind, taken the fire from the sand, overheard words not made for her ears. She has built herself on bruises and broken bones, on secrets and whispers, on treason and bitter truths.

With the support of her brothers, of her teacher, and a village full of people to prove herself to, Temari smiles. She is strong and, in time, Suna will be too. Their people will be hard, but not brittle. Their economy will pull itself from shambles and they will no longer rest on the edge of destruction.

_(Suna is strong, always has been, and she will make it stronger; forge it into something remarkable.)_

She’s Temari of Sunagakure and she will never bow her head.

**Author's Note:**

> Fuck, I love this. I think I did really well with the writing style? I had a lot of fun. I wanted it to be kind of raw, in a way? Because Temari is fierce and powerful and she _feels_ and that will never be a weakness. 
> 
> We all need Temari from a young age planning to change things and make them better. 
> 
> Temari is so smart!! Listen, she was rather old for a genin when she took the chunin exams and I had a bunch of reasoning for it and never saved it so I have no idea what my points were. But Temari is definitely intelligent and already planning minor village takeovers at the age of seven. Or at least thinking about them.
> 
> Listen, sometimes you're just 8 years old and hearing things you shouldn't and just becoming more certain you need to get your father the fuck out of power as soon as possible. 
> 
> Okay, maybe I want Temari to invent a new style. She deserves it!! She's awesome!! I did some googling about tessens and whatnot and that was some fun discoveries ages ago. Do I remember any of them? No but there's some cool knowledge that I found.
> 
> Anyway, in total, I really liked how I wrote this and I hope you all enjoyed it as well! Temari is an absolute badass and we should all love her. Silver, this was definitely for you.
> 
> For this, there are two songs that definitely work really well for Temari. One is [Unstoppable](https://youtu.be/_PBlykN4KIY) by The Score. The other is [Lions Inside](https://youtu.be/hMZMjEUHrS0) by Valley of Wolves and I think it fits her very, very well.

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [the sands are merciless (and yet the wind calls us home)](https://archiveofourown.org/works/28313142) by [SilverUtahraptor](https://archiveofourown.org/users/SilverUtahraptor/pseuds/SilverUtahraptor)




End file.
